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Stalked by the Stork...a diary of raising twelve kids

Having twelve children is an amazing blessing and one heck of a crazy ride. Join us through all the joys, smiles, tribulations and trials as we navigate this fabulous journey!

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

"I'm gonna have a problem"

Okay, so perhaps some would call me mean spirited for posting about this. But what I'm about to share with you was perhaps the funniest thing I've ever witnessed in my entire life.
Last Friday, I flew out to Denver with my friend Shannon. Shannon was experiencing some gastrointestinal issues. She suffers from IBS (irritable bowel syndrome) and had not been able to use the restroom for the past 8 days. This is because during Super Bowl Sunday she had held a party in which she'd prepared hot wings for her guests. Having only one bathroom in her house and not wanting her IBS to act up thus causing her to monopolize that one bathroom, she'd taken SEVERAL immodium tablets in order to stave off the problem.
So, we board the plane. Our first flight is to take us to Salt Lake City, Utah. It's about a 2 hour and 45 minute flight. About 2 hours and 40 minutes into said flight, the captain comes on the intercom and tells everyone to fasten seatbelts for our final decent. That's when I saw Shannon turn around in her seat and tell me "I'm gonna have a problem." Shannon was sitting a couple of rows in front of me. The look of panic on her face was insane.
"What?" I asked.
"I'm gonna have a problem" she repeated. She was squirming in her seat, looking mortified.
"shannon," I whisper, "Put your call light on if something is wrong."
She does and a moment later, a male flight attendent appears beside her seat.
Shannon becons him close. He leans down. Shannon becons him closer. He looks perplexed.
She clears her throat and tells him, "I need to use the bathroom."
"Mam, we're going to be on the ground in minutes." he answers.
"But I really need to use the bathroom," Shannon repeats.
"Are you going to be sick?"
"In a manner of speaking." Shannon answers.
"Well, I can bring you a bag" says the flight attendent.
Shannon shakes her head. "What I have to do....can't be done in a bag." she answers.
The flight attendent looks confused. "Are you going to be sick like this?" he askes gesturing towards his mouth.
"No. I'm going to be sick like this" Shannon gestures towards her butt.
"ohhh. I see." answers the flight attendent.
He pauses. Then he says, "Well, if you absolutely HAVE to use the restroom then okay. I guess we can just CIRCLE AROUND FOR A BIT. But we can't land with you in the lavetory."

Seriously. The funniest things I've ever seen. As it turns out Shannon was able to hold it until we landed. But she did have to move up to the front of the plane so she could be in prime position to hop off as soon as we landed. She had to give her baby to the man sitting next to her. A complete stranger! So freakin funny. If you want to drop Shannon a note of congratulations for successfully holding it...you can click on "The Woolf Family" on our link list. I'm sure she'd love to hear from you!

10 comments:

Christy said...

remind me to NEVER fly with you!!! LOL!

She is going to KILL you when she reads this!

It was so nice knowing you! LOL

The Rhoderick Family said...

You are sooo bad, Ang! What a hilarious story, but I feel so bad for Shannon. How miserable. I would have been in tears!!!

The Eadle Family said...

OH NO! LMAO!

Shannon said...

Okay - So I have not read this yet - not sure if I want to............. Thank you for recapping it. I don't think that I will be flying for a while.....

The Collins Family said...

I can not believe you posted this!! LOL! What an experience!!!

Jane said...

I didn't hear this story. LMAO!!!! Poor Shannon!

BoufMom9 said...

OMG!
I am posting about this tomorrow! LMAO!!!! hahaha

Sharlene said...

My favorite part is asking people to drop by and congratulate her for holding it. i have heard that story three times now and I am still laughing. I told my family about it and they were dying. Can you just imagine them circling the airport? Too hilarious.

Tabbatha Rose said...

Priceless!!

Shannon said...

Okay - But you forgot the whole "Well if you gotta go you gotta go" line that he just shook his head and said as he walked away.

Well written. Much better that I could have worded it!

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