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Stalked by the Stork...a diary of raising twelve kids

Having twelve children is an amazing blessing and one heck of a crazy ride. Join us through all the joys, smiles, tribulations and trials as we navigate this fabulous journey!

Monday, May 30, 2011

Updating to say there isn't really much to update.

Still no news to report. Each day I wake up and run to the toilet half expecting to find blood, and so far, nothing. Today makes 5 weeks, 2 days. Not a twinge of pain, no spotting, no cramping, nothing. I go in Tuesday for another HCG count. That should tell us something more definite. I'm not sure what I'm expecting from it. I'm just sort of in a weird limbo space. I have come to absolute acceptance that the pregnancy is probably not viable, but at the same time, I'm enjoying this time with Baby Penguin, especially since its likely all I'll have with him/her. At least here on Earth. As each day passes, its hard not to let hope linger, and to start to think "maybe the numbers were wrong, or maybe the doctor was wrong." And then, I remind myself that she's probably not wrong on this and that I'm setting myself up for major disappointment by getting attached to Penguin. But its sort of impossible not to. It's impossible not to secretly hope that he or she grows and grows and grows where he/she is supposed to grow. I am trying to keep my mind off of the situation and appreciate each day that I have and understand that this is in God's hands, and I don't need to do anything but sit back and trust God.
Tuesday, we should know more. I'll update when I can.

9 comments:

Amy said...

Thinking of you and praying for you. I wish I could give you a hug in real life, but until then just know I'm there with you in spirit.

Anonymous said...

Just don't let them talk you into anything unless you have irrefutable proof! Like u/s!
We have such amazing eyewitness testimony of Jesus! Look only to Him! Praying!
1 John 1:1-4 That which was from the beginning, which we have heard, which we have seen with our eyes, which we have looked upon, and our hands have handled, of the Word of life; (For the life was manifested, and we have seen it, and bear witness, and shew unto you that eternal life, which was with the Father, and was manifested unto us;) That which we have seen and heard declare we unto you, that ye also may have fellowship with us: and truly our fellowship is with the Father, and with his Son Jesus Christ. And these things write we unto you, that your joy may be full.
Prayer Bears
My email address

Jennifer said...

My thoughts and prayers are with you!

Anonymous said...

Still praying hard!!!!!!!!!!

Brian said...

Ten kids. How did you do it. Can you offer any advise on my current situation.
http://pleasehelpusgetby.blogspot.com/

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